What could all this be? Faerie orgies? Metal buckets full of bile? A light emanating from The Lady Jane College for Little Ladies that spans the globe? Somehow all these things are connected. Could imaginary bears have something to do with it? Or the young scholars currently lost in the far reaches of hell? Handyman Jack believes he can make a portal to hell himself with the help of his fleet of miniature porcelain mechanized hot air balloons and perhaps the powers of Archibald the Professor of Arcane Knowledge. But they need a human sacrifice to fill out the picture. Just then the doorbell rings.